Welcome to the launch of Just TypiKel Momday Motivations.

Why It Took A Wardrobe Failure? Because it was an absolute game changer in my fledgling career at Frankie Robinson Oriental Gallery. (Yes “Oriental.” This was the ’80’s and the word Oriental, rather than Asian, was common practice.)

My intention is to create a post every Monday, revealing a window into my memoir about the dramatic changes I underwent surviving ten years working alongside my type A mother at her successful Vancouver Asian antiques store.

Why?

Well, obviously to drum up a healthy interest in this book that I am writing …

and also to keep me happily blogging.

Why Momday?

Mom … Monday … get it?

These pictures were taken on my recent trip to northern Scotland. She graced the wall of the lodge’s cosy study and that window shot was of the view from my bedroom.

It Took A Wardrobe Failure

My mother insists that I begged to join FROG. I don’t remember that but I do recall being relieved that it was only for the summer.

I also thought that the selling aspect would be an absolute picnic.

Pfffffft.

A good six weeks slid by before I managed to sell anything. It was demoralizing, yet understandable. I was 27 and looked 15. Would you buy a $1500.00 antique Japanese cabinet from a 15 year-old who was incapable of answering any of your questions?

Add in my “helpful” suggestion that a couple go to Ikea to purchase a “reasonably priced” tv stand rather than buy our $900.00 antique Chinese blackwood table and Francine should have sacked me, I was that dreadful. However, in order to survive the summer, I finally grasped that I needed to take an interest in our inventory.

I shall never forget my first sale. It was to a lovely girl who wandered in looking for a unique wedding present for $100.00. She was a “first-timer,” about my age, and extremely shy. My heart went out to her as she flitted about the shop avoiding eye contact with me. Everything she looked at was over $1000.00, and with Francine making a deposit at the bank, only I could save the situation.

I began to babble.

“Do let me show you our Chinese porcelain peaches. I believe they could be just the ticket.”

My heart pounding, I stumbled to the locked glass cabinet and selected the prettiest one.

“The peach is a symbol of longevity in the Chinese culture. By giving the couple this peach, which is over a hundred years old, you’d be giving them a blessing for a long marriage.”

She bought it on the spot.

I couldn’t manage to sell anything more expensive until a fellow asked me to deliver an $1800.00 eight panel antique Chinese coromandel lacquer screen. It wouldn’t fit in his car and he wanted to live with it on approval for a few days!

Unfortunately, I had to take the screen apart to get it in my hatchback and it took me a good 20 minutes to individually schlep the eight panels down his endless driveway in my tight skirt and heels. The fellow offered to help but I wouldn’t hear of it.

Sweating profusely in his airless room, I hefted the two pins of each heavy panel back into the two metal side hoops on the matching panel. The first two were the worst! They wobbled and refused to cooperate. All the while, I prattled away in that pseudo English accent I adopt in times of stress.

“Well this is capital, isn’t it? I’ll have this together in two ticks of a lamb’s tail!”

It took ages but after finally getting the screen assembled and regally stretched out, I was shocked by the gentleman’s demeanor. Eyes averted, flushed and incapable of speech, he thrust his credit card at me. What happened to living with it on approval?

After being given the bum’s rush, I was both elated and thoroughly confused. I’d managed to make a previously unthinkable $1800.00 sale to a man who suddenly couldn’t look at me. What the hell happened?

All was revealed when I got back to my car and …

For more on how it took a wardrobe failure to make that huge sale, you’ll have to wait for the completion of my book with the current working title of “It’s Ok, She’s My Mother.”

Enough about me, I’m curious about you. Have you ever suffered a wardrobe failure? Have you ever shut down a sale? Better yet, have you ever been to Scotland? If you’d care to share, I’d love to hear.

See you next Momday.

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25 Responses

  1. Ooo. I love Scotland! The husband and I both have Scottish roots and took a trip there back in 2001. It was so much fun we were *this close* to throwing aside the notion of having children and just spending our money on grand vacations each year. Ha ha ha.

    Anxiously awaiting the reveal of the screen story. You know how to hook the reader. (Maybe you hooked that gentleman with something, too.)

    1. I’ll wager that as you sit in the charmingly chilly ice rink before dawn, a teensy, weensy part of you wishes that perhaps you’d thrown aside that notion of having children … Ha! Tis but a fleeting moment, I know. 2001? Sounds like you need to don the kilts and head on over again. I absolutely loved it and hope to toddle over there also. Perhaps we could meet up for a scone and a tipple or two.
      And yes, grinning here over your comment about me hooking the gentleman with something … wait and see!

  2. Oh my, I am still laughing, thanks for brightening up my Monday ! Love how you saved the sale for the young woman, and can only imagine your wardrobe malfunction !! Yes, I have been to Scotland twice, most recently in 2013 to visit my Dad’s childhood home. It is a wonderful country, a lovely friendly people ! The picture out of your window is amazing !!

    1. I didn’t realize you’d been to Scotland twice, Jane! How lovely. Must chat with you about your first trip and am SO delighted that I can do that sooner than soon. And yes, I was thoroughly spoiled with the location of my bedroom. Literally won the lottery on that one.

  3. Oh, Kelly, that is SO funny, and I can really hear your voice as you describe what I think you refer to as “prattling”. I’ve always thought you just had a better vocabulary and more experience of the wider world than the rest of us back in the day!!! Really looking forward to your book: don’t let the blog distract you!!

    1. Aw, thank you so much for reading and for popping in with a comment, Susan. I suspect Sister Page would argue though that my vocab needs work. I can still hear her admonishment that “independence NEVER dances.”

    1. Hi Amy. Thank you so very much for popping in and leaving a comment. Next post is up on Monday and it’s a beaut.

    1. Thanks so very much, Marjorie. It’s been a bit of a fits and starts journey but I think I’m finally on a roll. Fingers crossed.

    1. Oh now that’s the salient point, Kathy. Yes! I couldn’t wait to call her and “reveal all.” She was gobsmacked.

  4. Whatever it takes to make the sale. 🙂 My wardrobe failure? My wedding dress had 20 silk buttons up the back and my maid of honour didn’t notice at least 10 had come undone until I was at the front of the church. And this was before the days of zippers being under the buttons. I smile at the story though, and yours made me smile too!

    1. Hi, Lynn. Thank you so much for popping by and for leaving this comment. I am grinning here, hugely, over your button fail. Man alive, that would be something that would happen to me. Did your MOH deal with the buttons then or was it something she saved for later?

  5. I can’t wait for your book, Kelly. I have not been to Scotland but would love to go and the photo looking out the window is exquisite. I’m anticipating a wardrobe failure this week as we celebrate Thanksgiving here in the states. Luckily, I have a supply of stretch pants available for just such emergencies. XO

    1. Hurray for the plethora of stretch pants AND your wondrous cone of shame idea, Molly! I’m so glad we didn’t pitch ours when Poppy no longer needed it. Nevermind that it’s plastic and the chewed edges will scratch my neck. I shall wear a thick turtleneck.

  6. Oh my gosh, did you split your skirt? I bet you did. Or maybe your blouse came undone? You are KILLING ME with these teasers!!

    But hooray for the SALE! Booyah!

    You are such a good story teller, Kelly. It’s a gift, really.

    I’m going to have to start chanting “SHOW ME THE BOOK!” Over and over again until you SHOW US THE BOOK!

    1. Aw, thanks, Chris. I’m pounding away on it. Actually managed to write every weekday in November which is pretty good for me. Thanks ever for your encouragement. It means the world to me, truly.

  7. And one more thing I forgot to ask- Why on EARTH didn’t that man help you? Couldn’t he at least offer to help you as you struggled with that heavy, difficult piece? Geez. You deserved that sale. (And maybe he deserved what he saw! lol)

    Nuff said.

    1. Well, I think that lack of help was my fault. I can be very stubborn and I was trying so hard to prove myself. I go into that a lot more in the actual chapter of the book. Great question, by the way!

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