In true just typikel fashion I’ve done it again. Blundered about and messed up. Oh it’s not a huge deal but somehow I’ve managed to allow the first birthday of this Just Typikel blog to slip by without any fanfare or recognition. By a couple of days, you ask? Uh no. By over a month.
I’ll be honest. I only noticed the oversight when my daughter insisted kindly suggested I do a piece on the top ten affirmations of what makes me typikel instead of your regular typical. I went mining for material and discovered that my first “true” post aired in July of last year. Oops.
Ok so with the one year anniversary behind us and my own birthday looming at the end of this month let’s celebrate with some yummy cake and have a gander at what I consider to be the top ten affirmations of me being just typikel. Regular readers might recognise one or two vignettes but I’ve also tossed in a couple of new ones.
And no the above is not a typo. We’ve spelled birthday this way ever since my sister opened a “Happy Birthday” banner package and discovered it was lacking that second H.
Top Ten Affirmations of Just Typikel
1. Overlooking The One Year Anniversary Of The Birth of My Blog.
2. Awkward Auditioning Proves I’ve been Typikel For Quite Some Time.
In my university days I major in Theatre. This means a lot of auditioning for different roles. As I love to act but not audition it makes for interesting times. The classic typikel takes place during my very first one.
“Name?”
Startled by the shot-gun delivery of this monosyllabic question I manage to switch up the first letter of my first and last names.
“Relly Kobinson.”
I fail to summon the courage to correct the wrong and the subsequent obsession over this failure leads to wooden acting. Relly Kobinson is shown the door without an offer of a role in that particular production. Happily she never makes another appearance.
3. The Inadvertent Sending of Profane Emails.
Edit carefully boys and girls. Otherwise, you too might find yourself sending an unintentionally profane email to surely the sweetest speaking woman in the whole world. Can you spot the egregious error?
4. Blabbing Inanities To A Famous Actor.
This one is still cringe worthy months later.
My charismatic and unique 91-year-old mom and I go out for lunch with my friend Jane. After nabbing one of the remaining empty tables I volunteer to place the order. As I often do at this particular cafe I spot the actor Brent Butt standing in line ahead of me. Something snaps. This is the day I am going to finally say something to him. It mustn’t be something challenging or threatening but something entertaining. Something amusing. Something that we can bond over and hopefully cause the spawning of a wee laugh together.
“I say, it’s lovely to see your Instagram follower numbers rising.”
His head turns slowly in my direction; dread stealing across his reddening face. As the utter disbelief takes hold his eyes dart quickly about the room. Oh god. He wants to flee. This minute. Why the hell did I say that? He thinks I ‘m some kind of unhinged stalker. I dart back to the table feigning forgetfulness. Did you want the cheddar scone or the egg salad sandwich Mom?
When he is no longer in sight I step back up to the counter, order and return to my seat.
“Kelly could you be a love and get us some water? I’m sure Jane is even thirstier than I am.”
Christ. He’s sitting right in front of the water jug and the tray of glasses with his lovely wife Nancy Robertson. There’s no way I can obtain hydration without disturbing them. His face positively pales when he spies my approach. No doubt he is halfway through a rehash of his encounter with Crazy Instagram Woman.
Terrified I’ll inanely blather yet again my voice emerges as a wooden raspy quiver; totally unrecognizable to its owner.
“I’m sorry to disturb. But could I just slip by you for some water?”
Ms. Robertson shines her 160 watt bulb smile in my direction, oblivious to her husband’s angst.
“No! Let me pour for you! How many?”
I can’t help myself.
“Oh just 33 please. We’re a small group today.”
A spark of potential reassessment of my character blossoms in his eye as his wife and I share a grin. I gather my three glasses and leave them in peace.
5. Presenting As the Queen of Apathetic Mothers on Dorm Move In Day.
My two darlings M and H lay it all out in perfect English that very morning.
“Please don’t be the typical helicopter parent Mom. Let us unpack and get M moved in.”
Ok then. My job? To sit tight and assist when needed. First job? Help my son make his coed sister’s bed. I’m then gently asked to sit on that bed and await job number two. Everyone else in the room is whipping about. M and her first year roommate unpack their suitcases, the males dither with the electronics and the roommate’s mother zooms about with handi wipes disinfecting every possible surface her daughter might touch. I look like an idiot.
The second I shift my legs to prevent them from cramping H is at my side. He furtively holds his finger to his lips, shakes his head and hurls his other hand over his head in a frantic pantomime of whirling blades. I’m finally given permission to squash the discarded cardboard outside in the hall…
Two years later I’ll bet M’s roommate and her family are still talking about my overwhelming apathy. Ah well. I must have done well in my children’s eyes as they’ve asked me back for round three this upcoming Fall. Let’s hope the bed’s comfy.
6. Falling Ass Over Tea Kettle Into My Unsuspecting Neighbor’s Yard.
It was just meant to be the simple pulling of a weed or two. However as I find myself losing my balance leaning around the edge of the shared wall I reach out and grab onto the stone newel post. It grinds, shimmies and shifts. Desperately aware that I’m about to land on my ass in a yard that is not my own, I flail and soar slowly onto my back. The toppled newel post misses my head by mere inches. It’s obviously too heavy for me to lift up and put back. With my chortling daughter fleeing for anonymity into our house I drag my humiliated self to their front door to beg for help.
7. Managing to Photograph Everything But …
8. Constantly In The Wrong Spot At The Right Time.
Of course my two children can happily avail you with numerous examples of this just typikel behaviour. However for the sake of brevity I’ll share just one.
My children and I have had a lovely dinner and it’s time to leave the restaurant. I zip into the washroom and then head for the entrance. Somehow I find myself hovering over the deep fryer. In the hectic kitchen with the startled sous chef and his assorted crew. We hear plaintive voices calling out from the dining room.
“You need to come this way Mother.”
9. I see Naked People.
To get the full bare naked truth check this out. It’s worth it. I promise.
10. Locking Myself in the Bathroom on My Birthday.
Let’s hope this year we don’t experience a repeat performance.
***
So there you have it. My top ten affirmations that I am indeed just typikel.
The past 13 months have been an amazingly huge learning curve of a ride for me. In my next post I’m looking forward to acknowledging the incredible support I’ve received since I first dipped my toes into the blogging world those 13 months ago.
In the meantime I salute you. Thank you for reading, for commenting, for laughing and for hanging in there with me. Here’s to the next 13 months.
But enough about me. Tell me about you. What keeps you coming back to your favourite blogs? What causes you to simply unsubscribe to some? If you blog what keeps you motivated? Have you ever felt the tug to stop and chuck it all? Why? If you’d care to share, I’d love to hear.
29 Responses
That made me giggle and happy birthday to your blog! I take lots of pictures of everything but, too. As my daughter would put it, ‘Here’s a picture of a little bit of me’.. And oh no, you locked yourself in the bathroom for your birthday? Hope it doesn’t happen again, but you could stock up on some wine in the bathroom just in case,
Ah but the bathroom was in a b and b – close to the noisy kitchen but lacking in food… Glad I’m not the only one who takes a picture of a little bit of someone! Too funny.
Oh man, I might be a bit slow . . . typikel refers to typi-Kelly, doesn’t it? Thanks for sharing your adventures. If you are blundering, it means you are stepping into experiences & not hesitating at the sidelines, no? Admirable!
What a perfect way to view “blundering” Janet. “Stepping into experiences and not hesitating at the sidelines.” Love it. Thanks for popping by and leaving a comment. You’re not slow by the way!
Well I never picked up the typi-kel either. D’oh, smack upside the head. I thought it was like some new age pagan thing, although pagan has been around a lot longer than new age, hasn’t it? Or Canadian. Something Canadian.
Something pagan. Or Canadian. I’d say a bit of both Susan! Oh you make me smile. And to think that this time last year we’d never met!
LOL – what a fun way to celebrate a belated blog birTday. You’re a wonderful storyteller Kelly and laughter is never far from your wake. Makes for a delightful blog. I hope we have many more years to enjoy.
And what a lovely comment for me to wake up to. Thank you Deborah.
I have to agree – you do have some crazy happenings!! I loved the last 2 stories – the one about the guy walking around naked was crazy!!!
Thanks Kim. Naked guy was quite something. I felt sad for him though – here he was all happy-happy and he had no idea of the true impression he was giving. My son and I keep looking out for him but we’ve never seen him again. Maybe we just couldn’t recognise him with his clothes on …
That one college roommate may have been thinking, “boy, I wish my mom would stay out of the way!” You just never know.
Thanks Scott. You raise a good point and one I hadn’t thought of before.She might have been thinking just that.
Top 10 suggests there was a top 20 … can’t imagine what made that list!
So, here are answers to your questions.
1. I return to favorite blogs because of the voice. Those with a voice that enthralls me become repeat reads. I don’t get to these for every post; but I do make my way back.
2. I will unsubscribe if the author doesn’t bother to respond to comments. That’s where all the fun is.
3. I’m motivated to write my blog not only for my wonderful readers, but for my daughters to have something of me when I’m gone.
4. I’ve had the tug to stop blogging a time or two. Usually, they revolved around matters of the heart. I’d miss it too much, though. It’s part of me, and I’m part of it.
Oh Eli thanks! Cannot agree with you more about the fun being in the comments. That’s kind of like our gym, our coffee bar, our pub. And yes, your daughters are being gifted a treasure trove of gems to sift through in the future. As for my kids – well, I’ve learned that they don’t necessarily read me “fresh off the press” but they do go back and read later. Especially if their friends kid them about a certain thing that I might have mentioned on my blog…
Glad you’d miss blogging too much to stop – I love popping over to visit with you there.
Happy 13 months, Kelly! I enjoy reading about your antics because I can relate to so many of them. I have thought about chucking it all a lot this summer, but I’m just cutting back instead. I can’t read all the blogs I want to; there just isn’t enough time. If you can figure out how to give me an extra hour or two in the day, let me know!
Oh Dana I am with you on the not-enough-time-in-the-day-to-read-’em-all front. Although I do think you do pretty well! As for having an extra hour ot two well it’s funny. It’s Sunday morning, 7:38 AM and so far I’ve watered the plants, put away the dishes, had a coffee and popped in on a few blogs. If this was 15 years ago? Ha! I’d still be in bed sound asleep, subconsciously hoping against hope that my two wouldn’t surface for at least another hour… Why is it that when we can sleep in we don’t … ?
Congratulation, Kelly! Thanks for making us laugh – always WITH you and never AT you – and for sharing the stories of your inspirational mom. I loved doing our Partners in a Pair Tree together and hope we can team up again at some point!
Loved the story about your encounter with Brent Butt. Hilarious! Also love the expression “falling ass over tea kettle”. Do you have any idea of the origin of that saying?
Oh I would love to team up with you again too Mo! It was a hoot trying to keep up with you! I am still cringing over that Brent Butt encounter. Still see him regularly and he clearly doesn’t remember me. But (or Butt) still. As for Falling Ass Over Tea Kettle it has to have British origins. My pal Jane also says it along with “Rabbits” for the first word uttered in a new month and “Enough blue sky to make a pair of Dutchman’s pants…” when one spots a patch of blue sky. Have you heard of these?
No, I’ve never heard those expressions but I love them! Sounds like a blog post in the making! “Where in the world did that saying come from?!”
Oh clever Mo! Like it.
Great post Kelly! I need to do some catching up on your latest posts! Happy late blog anniversary!
Tracey! Thank you. And thanks for popping by.
Brilliant! Congratulations and happy birthday! This post has made me realise that it’s my blog anniversary this week, so thank you also!!
I like how you spell birthday, partly because it reminds me of the time I did a book report on The Animals of Farthing Wood, and made an accompanying poster which left out the ‘h’ in Farthing, much to the hilarity of my 6th grade English class!
Happy Blog Anniversary to you Claire! Smiling here at the book report story. I’ll bet several members of your 6th grade English class still recall that missing h. Funny.
Oh, Kelly happy 13 months of blogging! I can’t even tell you how long I’ve blogged. I’m not the gal who proclaims, “Readers! I’ve reached 20,000 likes on FAcebook in 6 months of blogging! I’m so thankful that I’ve got a dozen sponsors lined up to give away $500 in Paypal cash!”
Nope, not me. But I like connecting with genuine folks like you. And I simply like to laugh or learn or enjoy! So that keeps me coming back.
20,000 likes? Only? I’ve got 45,000 likes and earn $501.00 with PayPal sponsors. Ha! Nope – am with you on that point. I enjoy the blogging for the genuine connection too. Half the fun is reading the comments others have left on a site before me! Thanks for your support. A huge happy whatever anniversary to you!
First off, Happy Birthday Baby~Girl!!! Although we should be the one’s celebrating!!! Your blog brings so many bloggers, such as us, happiness and wisdom!! I can’t begin to tell you how much joy we get each and every time we visit your blog!! We’ve been absent as of late (two freaking months) writing our #2 book in our P-7 series, but are almost done & can’t wait to get back to our blogging buds like you!!! This post was awesome as usual Kelly!! I don’t know which made me laugh more. The stalker fan syndrome, Ass over tea kettle (lmfao) or the Relly Kobinson!!! That was the best!!! Sharing this post now to spread laughter throughout the blogosphere!!! Luv ya & Happy Birthday!!! 😉 xoxoxo <3
Aw, thanks for your kind words, and for stopping by for a read and for sharing. What a wonderful, energizing excuse though for being away from your blogging buds. So exciting. Reminds me to read #1 so I’ll be up to speed for #2. Brilliant. Will do.